Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Cookies for sale

After this blog post went out a mom that I like and respect was hurt and upset by it. She believes that people think that it is about her. That it will lead to gossip and that I wrote it intending to hurt.

 It's not. 

I think that (name deleted) is an amazing troop leader. She is what I would like my children to remember when they are teenagers.

"Our troop leader was so fun!" We did such fun things when I was in Girl Scouts. I truly think that she is the best of the people in our town and she will do great things for our girls. It saddens me that this whole bullshit situation will tarnish and end a friendship that could have been really nice.  

I don't know how many of you readers are a part of our troop. And I honestly don't think it matters. I write to a handful of people, most of them old friends that know me well. 

I have wonderful intentions. I want my daughter to be a part of something special. I want her to experience all the great friendships that girl scouts will give her. 

I also wanted to be a part of that process. It didn't work out. I didn't feel like my vote counted or that my opinion was being considered at all. And then some of you moms came to me and told me about the disrespect.  That is why I walked away. Not because of my busy schedule or job. But simply because I was only an assistant with no actual valued input. 

If some of you choose to make this gossip and put a spin on it. Oh well, you have far more time on your hands than I do. 

None of this means that our girls will ever see anything but smiles and hard working from me. I intend to throw a Tea Party on Tuesday to celebrate 101 years of girl scouts. 

This crap wont be referenced or talked about or inclined. It will be girls in dress up eating cupcakes and finger sandwiches celebrating friendship. 

I hope this answers some of your questions or doesn't. All I know is that I will be selling cookies in front of a grocery store with daughter and her best friend tomorrow. 

And I'll be at every trooop meeting with my head held high. Because I have done nothing wrong. All I wanted to do was sue me

I have been away from this seat for quite sometime now.

My daughter became a Daisy Scout and I (for a minute) was a co-leader of her troop. I am not sure if you have been told but they sell these cookies....oh, you've heard of Girl Scout cookies?

Well it is far more involved than any of these moms are given credit for. It takes on a life of it's own. So my laundry built up, my house got messier, my family has not eaten many home cooked meals. And sadly my blog went to the back burner. But I am no longer a co-leader (or apparently "assistant" was my appointed title). I don't know if I have mentioned this, but I have been told I am difficult to get along with.

Please hold your really pretend to be shocked for God's sake.

I won't go into details, lets just say there can only be one was not me.

It's ok though. I have another daughter who is coming of Girl Scout age and I will definitely be leading her. And I'm ok with that.

Through this scout thing I have felt disconnected. From my husband, my friends, my blog....

Life has a way of turning clouds to bricks in an instant. One minute you're happy and floating and the next you're covering your head waiting for the storm to pass.

I have 3 posts that got started and have yet to finish. Can you believe it's already March?? Where did the time run off to?


I feel like I woke up and realized all the things I had been forgetting. I felt really disconnected from my family. Even though this whole thing was supposed to be for Fish. 

Fish was invited to go to a dance convention/competition on the same weekend as her troop meeting.  Of all  the tiny dancers, her teacher asked mine to go. The little girl who was supposed to attend had to back out and the tuition is non-refundable.How could I possibly say no? I knew I had to let her go.....but I couldn't go with her. I made a commitment to the troop leaders and knew I was needed at the meeting. 

It killed me.

The knowing that I was doing this for my daughter who wasn't even there. The knowing  that I was missing out on watching her go some place new and experience something awesome. She had never even been that far away from me since birth. The convention was in San Francisco....a 3hr drive from me. So I cried and cried and cried. 

I worked the night before and went to the meeting with about an hour and a half sleep. It was an eye opening experience. I felt blindsided by comments made to parents and, upset to hear from other moms that when I'd speak eyes would roll and whispers would occur.

 I was missing out on a huge experience with my Fish......for this? 

That was it for me. I am totally willing to help whenever I am needed. Because we honestly have a great (and huge) bunch of girls in our troop. They deserve to be supported and that is what I love about the scouts.

That was when I looked around my house and saw the disaster it had become. And I realized I missed my kids and my husband.

We bought a new car and decided to make a quick weekend trip to Disneyland..............and THAT is another post