Sunday, January 27, 2013

The sick mommy myth

 I'm sick. I know you've heard that there is no such thing as a sick mommy. But that is a myth.

 My sweet Moose is a kissy face. He loves grabbing your cheeks and planting slobbery love on your face. So when I saw him start to dim, I got a little worried. When his fever spiked, I got concerned. When he started to projectile vomit, I freaking panicked. He loves on me ALL THE TIME. Not hard to connect those dots and start the countdown. Actually it's more like beat the clock. Trying to accomplish as much as possible before complete breakdown occurs. 

Everyone has been posting the same sentence on facebook 

"I don't have time to get sick!" 

It's completely true.I have too many things, appointments, projects, deadlines. Being sick is completely unacceptable. It's not just in my head......it's what we as mothers have made EVERYONE believe. Even when mommy is sick she has a job to do. If superman never stops fighting crime, mommies can never stop taking care of everyone. 

But yesterday was the exception. I got off work early the night before and went straight to bed. When I woke up my husband was gone hunting and my mother in law was with my kids. 

The other rule is :
No one can take care of your sick kids the way you can

I was already miserable..high fever, chills, nausea. I had the entire cast of Cirque du Soleil doing their act in my stomach. But when my tiny sick Moose looked at me...it was time to put my cape on.

 I felt like crying when I saw my husband pull up. The wave of relief....the other parent is here to save the day. Whether they like it or not. I didn't get the impression that he was that thrilled to be handed the cape. But I didn't really care. I curled into a ball tried not to die. I was supposed to work and tried to wish myself better so I could make it in.....that didn't happen. 

Throughout the day my Moose would periodically come find me. 

Get up! Do your job!


I could see the words on his tiny little face.

 He was in so much pain and exhausted. Every time I'd hold him he'd squirm and cry. And I just couldn't do enough for him.....I felt defeated.

 I didn't make it out of bed until almost noon today.


When I emerged from my bedroom my husband was standing in the kitchen. The look he gave me.....well, it didn't say things like LOVE or MISS YOU. Instead I got the direct impression it said 

It's about damned time and I'm finished now that you're up.

 Do I feel 100%? No, of course not. Does it matter? Nope not at all.


We have trained our families.They think that no matter what we feel like, we will get up to cook, clean and, care for them. That is exactly what happened. I got up, made lunch, took the cape back. 

My husband is outside with his buddy planning his next great hunting adventure. I'm planning the cleaning and disinfecting of the house. Yeah I think it's bullshit too. But I know my husband does more than most....so I can't complain too much. The angry kicker is that he has the kids out there.....no hats, no jackets, nothing to protect them from the cold. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? 

Did he so quickly forget all the vomit and liquid poo? His short term memory will be remedied quickly once the girls start following the path Moose and I just returned from. 

All I can think of now is...Please don't let my husband get sick. All us mommies know the truth. The men are so much worse than the children. I just don't have the energy yet to deal with that too. 

It's a bird! It's a plane!
 Nope it's just another mommy doing what she does